A Week of Heartache and Hope

Let me take you through a journey of the past seven days—a whirlwind of emotions that has left us forever changed.

It began unexpectedly on Monday, when we received a heart-stopping message from Zellie. She relayed that Nouha, mother to Nayiera—Cara's dearest friend—whom she had reached out too about a potential Zoom playdate, only to be told the devastating news that Nayiera was critically ill in the ICU. The photo Zellie sent shattered my heart, and I immediately contacted Nouha, desperate to understand the situation and how we might offer our support. The agonizing wait ended late that evening with a simple, crushing message: "Nayiera RIP."

Our world didn't just cave in; it collapsed. Nayiera was not just Cara's best friend; she was a radiant soul, beautiful in every way that truly matters. The bond she shared with Cara was deep, built on countless hours of Zoom (Covid) playdates and actual tea parties where, despite Cara's physical limitations, Nayiera made every game inclusive, imaginative, and magical. She never let Cara feel sidelined, always ensuring she was an integral part of every story. Words can hardly express my gratitude for Nayiera's profound empathy and the joy she brought into our lives.

Tuesday brought a tsunami of anxiety, with haunting questions of "how," "why," and "what if?" The thought of losing Cara is unbearable, a dark corner of my mind I dare not visit even in my weakest moments. This fear, compounded by the proximity to Cara's 11th birthday, plunged me into endless cycle of self evaluation, questioning every decision we have made, whether our journey so far has harmed her and always that lingering question of whether we are doing enough. Yet, in this darkness, my parents' intuitive support shone through, arriving on the next flight to be with us.

Thank you Mom and Dad for being an invaluable source of love and support.

Wednesday, Cara's 11th birthday, reminded us of the magic she brings into our lives. Her unbridled joy, even in the midst of sorrow, is truly contagious. I wish I could paint a picture with my words to share with you her joy, her laughter and excitement at 4pm, 5pm and 6pm as she waits for our family tradition of bursting into her room singing "Happy Birthday" and opening presents together.

Yet, this day also held a sobering moment with a visit to her Orthopedic Surgeon, where Cara's diagnoses of Scoliosis was confirmed—a topic I'll find the strength to discuss more in the future.. The evening was a celebration of her 11 amazing years with a family dinner(Jacques, Me, Lea, Cara, Zellie and Sadia) that allowed us a brief respite from our grief, a precious moment of 'normalcy' in our unique journey.

Fast forward to Saturday, Cara's birthday party was a mix of nervous anticipation and determined celebration. We chose not to burden Cara with the news of Nayiera's passing, honoring Nouha's wish to preserve her memory in a light untainted by grief.

The party was a vibrant celebration of life, love, and the unique bond shared by these incredible children. Nayiera's absence was deeply felt, yet the joy and resilience of these young souls reminded us of the strength found in community and love.

This week has been a profound reminder of the delicate balance between heartache and hope, between loss and love. It's a testament to the strength found in the support of our loved ones, the healing power of joy, and the indomitable spirit of children who face life's greatest challenges with a smile. As we navigate this journey, we're reminded that even in the darkest times, there's light to be found in the love and laughter of those who touch our lives.